Harry Potter Grief, 2024 Edition
Theme Park Boycotts, Consumerism, and Hope for Wizarding World Peace
Content warning: transphobia.
^ But I fear that if you’ve read even the title of this essay, it’s too late to avoid the hurt that pings with just the words Harry Potter. For that, I am sorry. I feel it too.
For those of you wondering if she [JKR] is still at it [tweeting transphobic things]? Yes. Yes she is.
I was wondering this myself, and didn’t want to know, but just as I was deciding I OUGHT to know, and feel ready to know, it showed up in front of me. It is disappointing, exhausting, and activating in its reminder that there is progress to be made.
Today I’m writing about this, because it feels far too late to write about this, but it’s still going on. Today I’m writing about this because I don’t know what to say about this, and that stops me from writing anything at all. Today I’m writing about this because I wish to simply reiterate that I stand with trans people.
I have been sheltered, as a fem-presenting non-binary person. The unease in my heart is one I have the privilege to process in private. But JKR’s persistence inspires my own and I continue to ask what I can do. I also wish to expand on how the state of the HP franchise has me thinking about capitalism and the commodification of imagination and belonging.
You might not know this about me because I haven’t mentioned Harry Potter in years, but I was kind of publicly known as a HP fan…
from my TEDx talk to multiple media features to speaking at fan conferences and leading HP-inspired personal development programmes. My closest friends from my most formative years were nearly all connections through Harry Potter. The books were a part of my magical awakening, and of my desire to be a writer in Edinburgh.
In high school I was known as the HP kid. This was sweet when closet nerds would confide in me about their book 7 theories they were too cool to share with their bros, or when a popular girl admitted to me that, one time, she made the MuggleNet trivia leaderboard, but don’t tell anyone. Some kids were mean, and would chide me: “After all the books come out, it’ll be OVER. What are you gonna do when it’s all GONE?”
I wrote songs about the books ending, how I had faith that the stories would live on through the fans. (One of these songs was to the tune of “How Far We’ve Come” by Matchbox Twenty). I cannot erase the series’ impact on my life, nor do I reflect on them fondly, in light of the author’s betrayal to the fans she unknowingly made space for to be their truest selves. Now I must hold faith that one day, JKR will change her mind and apologise, and somehow, I hope, we will have Wizarding World peace. Until then, I will do the best I can to play my part in achieving that.
Can you believe that JKR posted that transphobic essay nearly FOUR YEARS AGO…and it took me three of those years to feel ready to read it.
Last year, I decided to speak out against her transphobia, to break a silence that my Harry Potter activist friends and I talked about in private (Helpless. Exhausted). My friends were so supportive and sent me reading lists at my request. It took some time for me to start reading them.
But last week, I listened to a special episode of Harry Potter and the Sacred Text from July 2020: Owl Post Edition: J.K. Rowling and Transphobia with Jackson Bird. I would like to share my favourite quotes from the episode (which I highly recommend listening to, or reading the transcript of, in full).
First of all, it isn’t too late.
I felt embarrassed to listen four years later, when I remember this episode landing in my feed in real time. I am so grateful to Jackson, Vanessa, and Casper for holding this space, and grateful that I didn’t have to. I’ve had the privilege of taking my time. Years ago, I would have loved to have my own Harry Potter recap podcast. I was approached by a publisher to write a book about Harry Potter, and was sad it didn’t get past their legal department. Thank goodness I didn’t further align myself with the series, considering what was coming, and the urgency I would have felt to respond sooner. Divine Timing always reveals itself.
Here are my favourite quotes from the episode:
“I know that for a lot of people who have loved the Harry Potter series, there’s just enormous grief here. Grief that a series that has brought so much tolerance and love and safety and encouraged so many of us to stand for justice and to support those at the margins was written by someone who clearly can be so hateful. I know that there’s also anger in there, there’s exhaustion.”
- Casper ter Kuile
“[Some cisgender women] have pointed out to us that, from their perspective, J.K. Rowling is not being hateful. What she is, is scared. I just, I want to directly address my fellow cis women. I am a scared cis woman, but we know historically that misplaced fear can lead to hate, especially of vulnerable populations, so we feel comfortable living up to one of the norms of our company now. The first two norms are (1) to always assume good intentions and (2) to listen with the ears of the most vulnerable person who could possibly be hearing us.”
- Vanessa Zoltan
“She [JKR] said something to the effect of a lot of people were just jumping at her because it’s societally acceptable to stand for trans people without understanding why. I think there’s a little bit of validity there. […] but I think, […] a lot of people are just okay to love their fellow human and trust what a marginalized person’s experience is and trust it without needing understanding it. Of course, it’s great if they can understand and engage more, but just being able to be like, “No, I cannot have that experience, so I trust the person who does, and I will believe them.”
- Jackson Bird
With gratitude also to Grace for encouraging me to listen to the episode.
Before I continue, I’ll also recommend this guide to Firing JKR, which compiles further action steps with linked sources.
I’ve been thinking about what I’m committing to, besides not financially supporting JKR through merchandise, which has not felt right for years.
Most of all, I will not pretend this isn’t happening.
I will also not pretend to have the answers, or perfect action steps. But I will continue to tell the truth: that this is hurtful. This is what I wish JKR could have said, when frankly, she was hurt from being on Twitter too much, and for having too many followers. Not having quite enough strength to take the patriarchy head on (ok), instead she took on a marginalised group (unacceptable).
I have learned, time and time again, not to over-invest myself in something outside of me, be it an artist, their art, or especially, a company.
A few months ago it was announced that Universal purchased land in England to build a theme park. My fellow UK-based theme park enthusiasts celebrated the news, but I felt wary. I had decided to boycott Universal’s theme parks, which are JKR’s largest source of income (regardless of whether you attend the Wizarding World section).
It wasn’t a difficult boycott to participate in, living so far away from Universal’s parks, and not wanting to set foot in fake Hogwarts anyway. If anything, as a rollercoaster enthusiast, I’m curious to see what Velocicoaster is like, but I’m not even an Intamin girlie. I fantasised about going to Florida to ride Iron Gwazi at Busch Gardens Tampa, and making a Bold Activist Statement about NOT going to Universal even though it’s right there and I’d feel good about myself but also, BG Tampa isn’t perfect either, with its onsite zoo, nor are rollercoasters great for the environment, nor is flying internationally to ride them, so it’s not really about morality after all, and also — also: Morality is so hard 😭
I find myself sad that I can’t enjoy a multi-launch motorbike adventure because it’s themed to Hagrid’s motorbike (wait, no, Sirius’s motorbike. I still know these things), that I used to dream about riding, that now fills me with disgust — but that sadness feels so trivial that I have to make a STATEMENT about it and say that I am not riding this rollercoaster in defiance against transphobia, when if I’m being honest I’m not riding this rollercoaster because it makes me FUCKING SAD. And then I feel guilty for feeling mad when I could be GLAAD — ie, ashamed of my human feelings, which decentreing what really matters here, which is protecting trans lives.
Today my offering is to share this mess of feelings, in hopes that it lightens someone’s emotional burden in some way.
Because I imagine others feel this way too. We have to acknowledge this part to get through it, because if we’re feeling so overwhelmed with processing the sadness AND figuring out how to enact world change, we’re not really going to enact world change. Here’s one action step I suggest: Let’s change the way we treat our hurt.
I wish rollercoaster enthusiasts would acknowledge moral choices in visiting theme parks, but I think it’s easier to pretend these considerations don’t exist. Or maybe, others aren’t thinking about it as much as I am, because to be fair, I wasn’t talking about it either.
Even when the Wizarding World land first opened, it made me feel uneasy.
I had the privilege to experience it, in its second year of operation, and while I’d spent my childhood making HP-themed rides on Rollercoaster Tycoon, something about it in this context was unsettling. People referred to the theme park as ‘the real thing’ as if the castle we inhabit in our heads is not the real thing. The ‘real thing’ is gatekept with an admission fee.
The books helped me feel safe in myself. They were my familiar world I could carry from place to place, not one I could access only at an expensive theme park in Florida.
I remember the days before the merchandise, when I’d collect sticks to pretend were magic wands (they are ✨). But then, I went through a phase of wanting all the STUFF because that was connected with my devotion, and I just wanted to be seen and recognised. I wanted kids to see my Gryffindor t-shirt and talk to me about it. I still love repping stuff with my clothes today — rollercoasters and Britney Spears and Dionysus. It feels good, even if it’s under a jumper, and only I know it’s there. Now I hold the awareness that these things are part, not all, of me. Loyalty is to my self and to Truth. My self remains intact. I am whole, I am a mystery, I am changing and growing. I am not a commodity and I am more than a customer.
As the Harry Potter franchise grew, from the giant plastic castles to rollercoaster hippogriffs to the overflowing shelves of products at Target, and taking over Edinburgh’s Old Town, I feel a stronger sense of distance from the thing: it never was there, I think it was here. Here, in me. Not even entwined in the context of what Harry Potter offered my imagination. Those details only bolstered the magic of my self, and as I move forward, it is my self I retain.
I am here and I am doing my best, in each moment, and that includes taking my time and feeling my pain. I fear that one person not going to a theme park is not going to make a big difference. I also fear that not doing enough will keep me from doing anything at all. So here I am.
I’ll close with a final quotation from the Sacred Text episode:
“I hope that all of us can make a distinction between the woman who had amazing, visionary, creative capacity to write this story, and the deepest part of us, the truest part of us that maybe that story helped us be in touch with. That part of us, it never belonged to J.K. Rowling. […] I hope that, whether we continue to engage with the text or not, we know that nothing can ever separate us from that deepest part of who we are and that deepest love that connects us all.”
- Casper ter Kuile
Thank you for reading. Take care of yourself today ♥️
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